Of curious cats and krinkletoys, cabbages and kings..

The vicious beast responsible for the heinous acts detailed in my previous post (now, that's a ragdoll cat!)

My last post about Fina’s shameful behaviour during an otherwise civilised dinner with friends has generated quite a few enquiries: ‘What a shocking cat – why do you keep her?’, ‘Do you not fear for your own safety?’, ‘Have you considered keeping her locked in the attic?’ (we have, actually), ‘How could you expose her to small children?’ – that kind of thing. The most frequent question has been, however, ‘What exactly is this Krinkletoy thing* she showed such malevolence towards and where can I procure one for myself?’

I have therefore written this helpful narrative account of my quest to obtain a replacement krinkletoy for Fina.

How to Procure A Krinkletoy – An Instructive Tale

I strode into the pet products emporium in Darling Street. ‘Show me your finest krinkletoys!’ I demanded of the woman behind the counter.

‘Krinkletoys?’ she said in confusion. ‘I don’t think we have any of them, ma’am. Perhaps you mean bozzleboxes?’

 ‘What an absurd suggestion!’ I roared. ‘Krinkletoys are the thing I want – krinkletoys!’

‘Twizzletails?’ she offered helpfully. ‘Flufflebombs?’

‘Enough of your damned insolence, woman!’ I bellowed, and began to scour the shop myself, leaving the impudent harridan to cut up her wretched kangaroo meat.

I shortly discovered the object of my quest: krinkletoys, a veritable plethora of them, in every colour you could imagine! In unwitting imitation of the intended recipient, I pounced upon the display and eagerly pawed through it before finally selecting the very finest of them: a handsome krinkletoy with small upright ears, a neat pointed muzzle and turquoise and brown striations banding his feathered body. He looked tough and hardy as well: he would need to be to withstand the ordeal awaiting him.

I paid for the krinkletoy at the counter and requested that the woman wrap him in brown paper and string. She refused, objecting that she was not a Victorian shopgirl, so cursing her once more for her effrontery, I tucked him carefully in my reticule and proceeded home.

At home, I presented Seraphina with her new Krinkletoy and she immediately and delightedly savaged it.

*The good folk at Google would have you believe that this is a krinkletoy. Do not be misled: it is not. It is a stupid looking butterfly with twig antenna. No self-respecting cat would stoop to owning such an object. Please see my former post for a photo of a recently decapitated krinkletoy.


About bakersdaughterwrites

What to say? I’m a 30-something year old woman from Sydney notorious for changing her mind. I have a cat named Seraphina Nightingale, whic
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4 Responses to Of curious cats and krinkletoys, cabbages and kings..

  1. Brenda Lock says:

    Huh! Am I glad Phina was not in your Mum and Dad’s baggage. You will see why when you see their photos! We would have had to keep the hose pipe at hand and they may not have been able to go on their beach walk. OR we could have locked her up in the garage, I suppose, with her thingummybob during the day and let her out too play once it was dark. The thickbilled things stay at home during the night;;, probably too high up for her to reach, I imagine. It was great getting together with your senior family, really enjoyed it. Particularly the jamboree with the 10 – yes, 10 crayfish which none of us knew how to cook. They were delicious anyway. 2nd cousin Brenda.

  2. Margaret Diehl says:

    What I would like to know is: how many cat toys is too many in a two room apartment? Is it possible for a cat owner to be as ridiculous as those parents whose children need extra bedrooms to keep their toys in, yet still strew the living space with dangerously placed plastic objects?

  3. Jonathan says:

    My felines will have to try the krinkletoy.

  4. 100% feline satisfaction guaranteed. PS. I took a quick peek at your blog – so many cat videos! I feel positively stable in comparison – and for that I truly have to thank you…

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